Sunday, April 4, 2010
I have adapted
I would say that I have adapted to this weird marriage. It feels like I am the Landlord and he is a resident here. He basically only sleeps here, but he does pay for everything . It s a weird way to live. But this morning as I was hiding Easter Baskets as he slept onthe couch, and last nite as I put them togehter as he was out drinking, or yesterday as the kids and I colored eggs as he was out on a motorcylce ride with his friends, I was calm and accepting of it all. I have adapted.
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I am also in a bad marriage. Thankfully, I did have a way out without divorce. I am currently staying with my elderly parents as their caretaker. They were my saving grace, but my future is uncertain. I'm only staying married to this jerk, who runs hot and cold, has many problems--but won't admit it--and claims I'm the bum, even though I raised our son, kept the house and was a stay-at-home mom all these years. He places no value on what I did raising our son while hubby worked all the time.
ReplyDeleteHe's verbally and emotionally abusive, but in this state it doesn't count as an abusive relationship. Great huh? If I did get a divorce I'd lose my health insurance. At my age, I cannot go without health insurance, at least the SOB keeps me on it. Who knows when he will lose his temper with me again and cut me off completely, then I guess divorce will be in the cards.
SO, I can totally relate.
God bless, and maybe one day we will be happy.